This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
