So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
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