Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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