: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize