So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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