you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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