Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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