Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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