...so i touched it.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
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