There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
