apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
