But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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