Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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