Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
