I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
so much tequila, so little girl.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
