Kareoke will never be a sober sport
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
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