at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
