I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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