If i come over, it means nothing
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
