It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
