They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
