i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
