it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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