I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
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