i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
