love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
