we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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