i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
