I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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