What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
