I'd wear matching sweaters with you
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
