Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Randomize
