..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
