you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
