so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Randomize
