Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
