mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
