I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
