just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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