Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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