piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
