Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
