trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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