Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
