love makes seman taste better
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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