Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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