I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
