Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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