idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
