So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Randomize