that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
